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14 May 2016

REVIEW: Addictaball

Get the ball rolling.

Hello. First of all; ARRRGGGHHHH! WE'RE SO ^$%&ING FRUSTRATED! ARRRRRGGGGGHHH!!!!! DAMN THIS THING TO HIGH HELL! DAMN IT! IT CAN GO $”&* ITSELF FOR ALL WE CARE. £%^& YOU AADICTABALL,£&%! YOU! Anyway, lets review Addictaball.

Review what? Addictabll is a 3D spherical maze in which the player must gently spin an enclosed plastic ball to guide a tiny ball bearing from one end to the other. Sounds pretty simple, but this maze is fully 3D, contains 138 different obstacles to overcome, and is the most frustratingly enjoyable (or enjoyably frustrating?) thing we've ever played with.

There are two sizes of Addictaball available; a smaller 13cm diameter ball, and the larger 19cm diameter version that we were sent. Both are pretty infuriating, because although Addictaball is recommended for ages eight and above, as grown-ass men we're still having trouble getting past stage 20... of 138!


Addictaball is one of those novelty toys that you buy either for yourself or the kids, play with it for a day or two, the put it aside for a while, to return to when your hands get restless. Only it isn't, because once you start you really don't want to stop until you've conquered it (and the other players around you), because each time you fail and the ball bearing tumbles from the track to bounce off of the inside of the transparent sphere, it's almost as if the Addictaball is judging you. We wouldn't be surprised if they released an electronic version that declared “YOU HAVE FAILED” ever time you do.

Nice and tactile, the Addictaball truly is addictive. “Come on,” you tell yourself, “let's try and get past that tricky yellow bit – I'm really keen to see what happens on the purple part. There's a spiral and everything!” So you pick it up again, despite having just launched it out of the kitchen window before slamming your head repeatedly into the fridge door. You twist, you flick, you gently (oh so gently) spin the ball... and you've almost got it; almost managed to get through the difficult bit that you've been stuck on since Christmas. And clunk, the ball bearing falls. You are a failure. It's straight back out of the kitchen window, and your head is back on the fridge.


And then you discover that Barry, your so-called mate, managed to get all the way to the purple bit while you were in the toilet last week, and your rage turns to determination. So you pick it back up (from the lawn) and try, try, try again. Finally you do it! Hurrah! You're on the next bit – a sort of annoying see-saw thing – and you are happy again! Then you look up and notice that it is three days later, you've soiled yourself rather severely, and your boss is wondering where in Christ's name you are.

Welcome to Addictaball. You belong to it now.

£14.99 (large)
£9.99 (Small)





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